Eula has just asked me now if am going to live in YM tonight. I am reminded of Maria‘s wish: Sana hindi kailangang matulog.

Deep sleeper me wants not having to sleep. Especially this week when I have deadlines before I take off for Sing. Especially last week when I agonized over a project proposal. Especially this week, last week, and the rest of my life as I have found immense joy in existing online. Oh yes. I am fully satisfied in the cyber world. (Hahaha! This sounds like am surfing porn!)

The problem though about living in the Net is I find it more and more difficult to focus. It seems there are ten million four hundred thirty seven trains of thought set on loose and it’s extremely hard to follow a single track. It’s potentially catastrophic for my work because I end up distracted and involved in all sorts of research and imaginings very few of which have anything to do with the subjects of my write-ups! Facsimile machine!

But but but, this is reassuring for my future plans of relocating to the province. I can relish the sea breeze and still feel part of civilization. I can be with Mother who loves me totally and still be connected with all those I love and don’t love yet. And I can sleep whenever or not at sleep at all! Allelujiah!

Last night, I slept through Harry Potter 5. I should’ve estimated the pace at which a big bag of popcorn could be munched so one stays awake the entire length of the movie and discerns whether or not the raves are deserved. But even if my dead brain did manage to make a correct computation, I would most likely still snooze in between those calculated chews. With my tongue hanging out. Heck, the rapid crunching of that tasteless corn was the only thing that kept me conscious throughout the trailers prior to the main movie. I couldn’t have lasted no matter how I masticated.

Besides, I really really wanted to be home and get rested. I was in the theater because that was the best way to kill time until the three million seven hundred fifty six and two shoppers and loiterers of SM North dissipated. I couldn’t possibly get a ride in SM on a Sunday evening without having to compete with a mad crowd. Waiting it out with Harry seemed like the best idea.

Why was I in the mall anyway? Because because my celfone just refused to charge since the night before. And the night before, I was out with Eula, Alvik and Margaret in Taby’s along Maginhawa Street. Because because that is where Eula and I finished our looooooong Maningning-Mapangkawanggawa-Maginhawa-CP Garcia-twice-around-the-Acad-Oval-Krus-na- Ligas-Maginhawa walk, which seemed short as I was blabbering non-stop about the passionate discussions in my virtual universe. Hungry from all the walking and talking, I got busy gorging the Sexy Spicy Sausage Spaghetti. Meanwhile, Eula was inviting true friends to join us for drinks. And true friends came. And true friends Alvik and I so enjoyed our true friendship we stayed until past 4 am! The sun was yawning when I got home. Fax machine!

Yet yet I was on my feet by 7:30 am. I was set on joining a Manila Tour put together by my college organization whose egroup has been having zealous, thrilling, stressing discussions of which I am among the provocateurs.

The tour was most enjoyable and by the time it finished, I had to rush to the mall to finally get my celfone fixed.

The celfone fixer told me my fone ain’t broke at all. Frak. He was right. When I got home past 11pm, the freakin’ thing was charging again. There were stored message invites for videoke and drinks. But no no no, I needed sleep.

Otherwise, I would have slept for fourteen hours straight. Which is what happened Friday night. I was up the night before until the next morning beating a deadline. So by 730 that evening, I was zonked out in the living room while adorable Tita, mother of fanciful Belinda, was viewing television. Sometime later, I woke to inaudible voices. I lifted my heavy lids and noticed that roomie’s relatives had arrived. I mumbled a greeting, staggered to the toilet and peed, staggered back to the couch, and dropped down to resume my heavy slumber. I was that sleepy and tired. Couldn’t bring myself to take the few steps up the stairs and into my room where a comfortable bed patiently waits. Luckily, the visitors didn’t mind my dead presence.

So am I going to live in YM tonight? Afraid not.

Maybe tomorrow night. πŸ˜›